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Healing Developmental Trauma: How Early Trauma Affects Self-Regulation, Self-Image, and the Capacity for Relationship
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 10 hours and 29 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Tantor Audio
Audible.com Release Date: June 30, 2015
Whispersync for Voice: Ready
Language: English, English
ASIN: B00ZYL0D9S
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
Briefly put, this is one of the most important and profound works in the whole trauma literature. The authors' thesis holds that developmental trauma is very different than PTSD. Developmental trauma is radically far-reaching and colors the entire life of those affected by it. The athorrs outline five different adaptive survival styles used by infants to cope with trauma. The five styles are chronological in order. The first, connective survival style, is the earliest and most impactful. It takes place between birth and about a year. Where the child receives inadequate nurturing or abuse, this style becomes dominant. Other styles come in different times and have their own but less catastrophic impact. In the connection survival style the child adapts by disconnecting from his(or her) physical and emotional self. As a result, the child experiences great difficulty in relating to others and is often isolated without knowing how to address the problem.The other survival styles flow in later stages of infant development progression : attachment (difficulty knowing what we need and feeling that our needs deserve do not deserve to be met), trust (feeling that one cannot depend on anyone but themselves and feeling a need to be in control), autonomy (feeling burdened and pressured with difficulty setting limits and saying no directly), and love-sexuality (difficulty integrating heart and sexuality).The book focuses almost exclusively on the connective survival style. The two authors spend a great deal of time describing the conditions that cause this style and the difficulty that those who use it have with even recognizing it. They also spend several chapters outlining how to address the connective survival style therapeutically. In fact, those chapters are a superior description of how to operate therapeutically. Anyone in a helping profession could profit by reading them.Yours truly is one of the connective survival products. Reading the book felt like seeing myself for the first time and knowing why I was this way. The book well shows the disastrous consequences for a combination of abuse and neglect. I’m not sure what to do with all this yet but do something I will.
The title of this book should be: "Healing Developmental Trauma for People with Connection Survival Style," because-- despite discussing FIVE survival styles-- the authors ultimately focus significantly on Connection. My interest was piqued when I read about Attunement Survival Style, which I very much identified with. But the authors only delved more deeply in Connection, and finished the book speaking broadly and generically about trauma. I was very disappointed.
One of the best books I've read to help me move forward on my life path! It's a harder read then 'Waking the Tiger' by Peter Levine but a good follow up, and takes a step further by explaining in detail the differences between shock and developmental traumas, and the different ways we adapt to survive. It's written for therapists so definitely a more difficult read for the average person, but worth the effort. After reading this book I found myself letting go of blaming myself for my own personality 'flaws' (called adaptive styles) and of the feeling of not being enough. I have become more knowledgeable and accepting of the therapy process. I also found this book exceptionally helpful as a parent. I find I am now accepting the role I unwittingly played in my children's development, without blame. And I hope to better understand and relate to them as adults. Heller & LaPierre provide a few suggestions at the end of the book to therapists on how to best work with their clients. These could be beneficial to the layman looking for a therapist. There is no self-help or how-to advice, other then through better understanding and to have patience with the therapy process.
As a graduate student, this book has been fundamental in blowing the doors off of my own developmental trauma and understanding it in others. Taken in context with other therapies, theories, and how trauma has historically been approached, this book takes on even greater meaning.I can understand some reviewers' frustrations however, because while it's a concise overview, it won't answer all of your questions. (i.e. Can you have more than one survival style? Yes!) As a student, I have the luxury of dissecting the readings in class. It's very helpful.If you are a graduate student working towards licensing in therapy, social work, etc., or if you have a firm grasp of basic psychology and healing, you will find this a fairly easy and fascinating read. I wouldn't call it a "self-help" book, but it is certainly enlightening.As to the claims that it's not scientific, perhaps that is because there's not a citation in the book. While this is usually an issue for me, in this case, these theories are their own, based on their own work, and built upon accepted and known psychological foundations. If you need citations for basics like attachment theory, brain functions and the like, perhaps this is not the book for you.Other books I would recommend to help complete the picture would be Frank and La Barre's The First Year and the Rest of Your Life and Young, Klosko, and Weishaar's Schema Therapy.
The best book about trauma I have ever encounter. If you have read tons of books, have done lots of work on yourself, have tried different healing modalities and have seen a few different therapist and yet, years after still know that there is something that doesn't quite fit because certain emotions just keep coming up, then this is your book!!!!!! This book is so packed with information I feel like I graduated from a psychology class. You will find yourself and understand so much more about yourself , your past , your trauma , the " why " this and that . I can not recommend enough. I first borrowed the audiobook and then I had to buy the actual physical one. It's your life and you deserve to heal . Much love and blessings in your path to integration.
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